"Lagom" the word of perfect balance. Live a Lagom Lifestyle.

Hello there, this is my first attempt of a blog article. The idea has struck me quite a few times - Oh it must be nice being one of those wise, well spoken and charismatic people writing about the most interesting things all the time. Maybe i could do just that, if i manage to figure out what my thing is, though i don't really have that much interesting going on...

But here it goes,

For the last few years, in my late teens and now early twenties i have been doomscrolling the infinite self development / success guru content existing on social media. Everything from Paul Saladino and his extreme Carnivore diet, Frugal living and extreme minimalism as seen in Matt D'Avella´s "The Minimalists, less is now", Jordan B Petersons rules for life and eternal deep dives about the bible, Chris Williamson, Joe Rogan, David Goggins, Ali Abdaal......

It has come to my understanding that my binge consumption of these people and their ideas had me combine their eternal wisdom into some sort of "lifestyle template" that i somehow have seen as necessary for me to follow if i want to avoid being a useless loser..

It looks something like this.

The Lifestyle Template of The Greats

Take cold baths, become shredded and impressivly strong, read all the books on how to be the best in every category of life, become a dangerous and wise martial artist, utilize every moment for maximum productivity and learning, learn how to speak like a charming, well educated intelligent person, keep your room in perfect order and simply be extraordinary.

Well thats a daily routine to behold...

Trying to be similar to people, who are extremely successful in their chosen field and have been doing great things for more years than i have been alive, is a pretty high standard. And as you know, not reaching the standard you have set for youself makes you feel like a loser, a lazy, improductive, childish loser. If you have been tossed around the self improvement space you might recognize this feeling.

Two days ago i went to the library in my hometown of Varberg, Sweden looking for some books that i have heard about in the self development space, and also to take a break from reading Jordan B Petersons 12 Rules for life since my brain was melting from the complicated comparisons between Adam and Eve's sins and our modern life (I do like the book, but it's probably the hardest book in English i have read in my entire life).

On this trip, I stumbled upon Mark Mansons The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A Fuck, a book i had heard about before with a very attractive title, who wouldn't want to be the guy that just can't be touched by bullshit? Plus, it was only about 200 pages.

This book gave me a slap of fresh, no bullshit air in the face.

With the charisma of a close and confident friend Mark talks about how the standards and values we set for ourselves result in our self-esteem and confidence. He brought up the idea of chasing what we think of as success will inevitably make our current situation feel not good enough. This made me realise, that my attempt of developing the habits of successful people made me look to escape from my current lifestyle and deem every aspect of it as not good enough. Thats rather harsh.

Lagom

Now this brought back a Swedish word into my thoughts, Lagom. It means just the right amount and there is no word to replace it in the English dictionary. There is a myth that the origin of the word Lagom comes from the old farmer society, that families usually had to share the daily food from one pot. So for everyone to get their share, each person took a Lagom portion of food and drink. But that origin story might as well be nonsense from someones talkative grandparent.

Lagom cooking pot

So, What Am I Trying to Get to With All This?

Self development is great. Wanting to and acting to become a better version of yourself is a honorable attribute of any person. As with any idea however, we are easily attracted to the extremities and may unintentionally set our goals and standards in a way that makes our current life, hobbies, car or wife look like its all missing something. Something that we need to be satisfied. Now the art of Lagom, of just the right amount, might be a necessary antidote for the new life advice shoved into your curious brain from the trendy millionaire guru in your Youtube feed.

So give yourself a pat on the back, take a breath and give yourself the gift of appreciating what's there, already, today. Live a Lagom lifestyle.